The Men's Cafe 2025
- Thuthukani "TK" Ndlovu
- Jul 1
- 3 min read
// Beyond Mental Health Awareness Month //
Men's Mental Health Awareness Month may be over, but the conversations and connections it sparked cannot end with the calendar. The first two Men's Café gatherings at Café Mocha in June proved that men are hungry for authentic connection and safe spaces to share their struggles. Around shared meals that included pizza in one session and injera in another, a diverse group of men gathered to discuss everything from the weight of expectations to the challenge of expressing vulnerability without judgment.
What emerged from these circles was profound: men don't just need advice, they need genuine community. The discussions revealed how many men operate with limited emotional vocabulary, often cycling between anger and happiness with little in between. Participants shared the burden of recurring stress, the fear of having vulnerability used against them, and the difference between being around people and truly feeling seen. These weren't therapy sessions but rather honest conversations that created something sacred in their simplicity.
The path forward is clear. Men do talk, contrary to popular belief, but the challenge lies in what topics we discuss and the spaces we create for deeper conversations. The vulnerability shared over shared meals and guided conversations showed that healing happens not in isolation but in community. These gatherings confirmed that men are ready for more meaningful dialogue when given consistent, trustworthy spaces that allow for authentic sharing about mental health, relationships, and identity.
Key Takeaways for Men:
Community over advice: Men need genuine connection and support networks, not just guidance or quick fixes.
Expand your emotional vocabulary: Most men are raised with only anger and happiness as acceptable emotions, but there's a whole spectrum in between worth exploring.
Vulnerability requires the right conditions: It needs space, timing, and trust. You can't rush healing or force authentic sharing.
Recurring stress is the real problem: One-off stress is manageable, but ongoing, unaddressed stress becomes the real threat to mental health.
Choose your confidants wisely: Not everyone knows how to handle vulnerability well, but the right person's presence can be life-saving.
There's a difference between strength and hardness: True strength can be honest and unguarded, while hardness often masks fear and pain.
Even heroes need help: The strongest men in your life sometimes struggle too, and that's perfectly normal and human.
One-on-one connections matter: Some men bond better in individual conversations rather than group settings, and both approaches have value.
Seek help before the crisis: Don't wait until you're drowning to reach out for support, whether professional or personal.
Start with just one conversation: Healing and connection begin with a single authentic exchange, not grand gestures.
We will continue creating this space on the last Sunday of each month, so (if you're in Harare) mark your calendars for July 27th. There's also been growing interest from men in other cities and countries who want to establish similar spaces. We're exploring the best ways to support and facilitate these initiatives, ensuring that those who feel called to curate such spaces in their communities have the resources and guidance they need to create meaningful connections for men everywhere.
This is a brilliant initiative. Thank you for creating this space for men to just be!!!